Anthony Dellaventura 1948-2010

I don't remember our first conversation, but it was probably about Catholicism. Later, we moved on to every other subject in the universe. But in the beginning, I can remember that we were discussing health supplements and alternative medicine (he was an almost-daily customer in the store where I work), when the rather intimidating ex-NYPD cop suddenly reached out and touched the St Jude medal I was wearing.

"Patron saint of lost causes," he mused, in his heavy New York accent. Luhwust Cuhwuzzes, is how it sounded to me.

"Yeah," I agreed.

"Are you a lost cause?" his voice turned suddenly gentle, and I was caught off guard.

"Probably," I admitted.

He narrowed his eyes. "You are not. You are a very intelligent and beautiful person." He seemed to be speaking very honestly, and I was struck silent, which never happens. I was embarrassed to be complimented.

"You don't believe me," he was inspecting my face. All at once, I was aware that he had been a professional interrogator. "You believe what all these assholes say," he waved his hand around, as if to encompass the whole world (and particularly the Catholic Church) in "all these assholes" and I laughed.

He narrowed his eyes again, "Really. It isn't funny. You do. Well, don't. They dunno shit." And then he smiled. An amazing, award-winning smile.

And for a few years, Tony Dellaventura brightened my life. I saw him nearly every day. He drove an enormous custom Harley-Davidson and dressed in leather; tattooed from head to toe, able to bench-press 200 lbs at age 60, he was a striking figure. His name was Snake; the name tattooed on his throat, right above a snake. It was a long time before I knew his real name.

"Are you tattooed everywhere?" I once asked, curious.

"Every inch," he assured me. And he said he had a dragon down below, the dragon's tail becoming, well, you know.

I'm sure my eyes popped, "Didn't that hurt?!?"

"Oh hell yes," he said, matter-of-factly.

We argued about politics mostly, after it was discovered that we were in near-total opposition, yet agreed on certain libertarian basics: Let people have their guns, their dirty movies, their weed. (The mention of weed being illegal made him roll his eyes.) He particularly liked Ron Paul (as I wrote here once before), and was suitably impressed that I had gone to the Peace Center Amphitheater to hear Congressman Paul speak, even as a lefty. We would argue until we were interrupted, or until he would get thoroughly pissed off and walk away from me. But he was never rude.

Sometimes he would return later in the day, "And another thing..." and reply to what I had said earlier. He always heard me out and let me make my point, sometimes granting that I was right. It was during these conversations that I would hear references to his experiences as a cop; things he had seen that influenced his views in often surprising ways. Even as a fairly right-wing guy, he would freely admit (for instance), that gay people were unfairly targeted, since he had seen it himself so many times. And his New Yorker-honesty and bluntness always impressed me a great deal, since it was steeped in the harsh reality of what he had actually witnessed.

He ate a very healthy diet, almost fanatically so. When he told me he had pancreatic cancer, I was shocked; he seemed like Iron Man. (I knew the odds and I was upset.) And after that, Tony lost weight rapidly. He went back to New York City for treatment, then returned to South Carolina. I wanted to take his photo at one point, but he wouldn't let me, "I don't look so good right now, wait until I look a little better."

I didn't see him after that.

From Tony's obituary in the Staten Island Advance:
STATEN ISLAND, N.Y. — Anthony (The Snake) Dellaventura, 62, of Huguenot, a lifelong Staten Islander and a retired NYPD detective and private investigator whose rough-and-tumble workdays were dramatized in the television show “Dellaventura,” died Thursday in Calvary Hospital’s hospice in Brooklyn, after a long battle with pancreatic cancer.
I have never seen the TV show named after him, but I loved knowing someone who was the subject of a TV series.

He was exactly the sort of larger-than-life personality that great TV-characters are made of.
Mr. Dellaventura joined the NYPD in 1969. After two years in uniform, he spent five and a half years as a plainclothes anti-crime officer, charged with posing as a drug dealer. Described as a “cop’s cop,” he later was assigned to the Organized Crime Control Bureau, and was promoted to detective in 1981.

A fourth-degree black belt in martial arts and a weapons expert, he had been in a shootout with a robber in the parking lot of the Staten Island Mall.

Upon his retirement in 1984, he opened his own private investigation company and was hired by attorneys trying to uncover hidden funds during divorce cases, property owners looking to rout crack-dealing squatters, and film studios who wanted to destroy bootleg copies of new releases being sold by vendors on city streets.

The secret to his success in business, he once told the Advance, is being both a good sleuth and establishing confidence and good faith with clients.

Known as “The Snake,” he told New York Magazine in a 1992 profile that his friends gave him the nickname “because of the way I strike, like a cobra. But you couldn’t pay me a million dollars to beat someone up or kill somebody.”

He also said he was willing to do anything necessary for a case, as long as it didn’t include breaking any laws. Instead, Mr. Dellaventura’s hulking physical presence and intense face — he rarely cracked a smile — were often enough to intimidate even the most hardened criminal.

Actor Danny Aiello portrayed him in the drama “Dellaventura,” which recreated some of Mr. Dellaventura’s real-life cases during its run on CBS from late 1997 until early 1998. The episodes were based on events straight out of the detective’s caselog, with details changed for confidentiality.

Mr. Dellaventura told the Advance in an interview when the show debuted that he was pleased with Mr. Aiello’s performance, noting the actor resembled him physically — minus Mr. Dellaventura’s collection of more than 240 tattoos, which would have taken a makeup artist hours to recreate.

Mr. Dellaventura also served as a bodyguard for notables including Jack Dempsey, Sid Caesar and Harry Connick, Jr.

A deeply committed, born-again Christian, he was an active member of Faith Fellowship Ministries in Sayreville N.J., and Grace Fellowship Ministries in Greer, S.C., where he had a second home.

“He was just a tremendous friend to people,” said his wife, Susan. “You could call him at 3 in the morning and he would get up and drive to California to come to your aid.”

Mr. Dellaventura’s passions were rooting for the New York Yankees, riding his Harley-Davidson through the mountains of South Carolina, boxing, and watching old movies.

Most of all, he loved spending time with his family.

Surviving, along with his wife of 20 years, the former Susan Villani, are his sons, Anthony, Philip, Nicholas and Salvatore, and his daughter, Lucianne Dellaventura.
I met Susan and Salvatore, but not the rest of his family. My thoughts and prayers are with them.

I will miss you, my friend, as well as our spirited arguments and your solemn promise that you would settle the hash of anyone who messed with me. Your wild tattoos and multicolored, humongous Harley, making all kinds of rumbly noises in the parking lot. Must be Snake, I would think.

Reflexively, I sometimes still think it's you.

There are only a few in the world like you. So few. If you have indeed found that Afterlife we so often argued about, put in a good word for your favorite Lost Cause. I love you, and we sure do miss our favorite ex-NYPD cop here in Carolina.

Rest in peace.

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How tall is Mary McCormack?

Height: 5 feet 8 inches

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Eric McCormack Height

How tall is Eric McCormack?

Height: 5 feet 11 inches

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Height: 6 feet 0 inches

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Kandyse McClure Height

How tall is Kandyse McClure?

Height: 5 feet 1 inches

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Kelli McCarty Height

How tall is Kelli McCarty?

Height: 5 feet 6 inches

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Paul McCartney Height

How tall is Paul McCartney?

Height: 5 feet 11 inches

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Jesse McCartney Height

How tall is Jesse McCartney?

Height: 5 feet 10 inches

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Jenny McCarthy Height

How tall is Jenny McCarthy?

Height: 5 feet 6 inches

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Andrew McCarthy Height

How tall is Andrew McCarthy?

Height: 5 feet 9 inches

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David McCallum Height

How tall is David McCallum?

Height: 5 feet 8 inches

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Monday Music: Why we build the wall

I was driving through the bleak, forgotten areas of Jim DeMint's old congressional district today; not deliberately. En route to somewhere else and got lost. Ended up in the old Greer mill village, which used to be entirely composed of poor whites, then during the 80s it was entirely poor blacks... and now it is 100% Hispanic, including all of the skimpy corner food-marts (that don't sell actual food), the hair salons, gas stations and other tiny businesses. Does Senator DeMint know all of these brown people are here? Miles and miles of them? He must know. Do they mow his lawn or launder his dress-shirts that he wears to important Tea Party events?

Obviously, from the looks of the place, he counts on them not voting.

It had grown cold and dusky, as I meandered through the extremely depressing atmosphere... when suddenly, I heard this song on WNCW... it was perfect accompaniment for what I saw everywhere, all around me. It made me cry.

An excellent introduction to the holiday season. As Ebenezer Scrooge famously asked, Are there no poorhouses?

~*~

This amazing song is from Hadestown by Anais Mitchell. I could only find this version (with two songs). "Why we build the wall" is the first, "Our Lady of the Underground" is second. "Why we build the wall" ends at approx 4:00.

You must hear it.



The first song features Greg Brown, the second, Ani DiFranco.

FOTD: Easy Pop of Colour Eyes

Hi Beauties,

I wanted to do something easy and fun yesterday with my makeup. A little pop of colour is always so much fun and easy to do.


My inspiration: Leona Lewis





Eyes:
Painterly Paint pot
MAC Brule allover
MAC Soba on the crease buffed out for dimension
Loreal HIP cream eyeliner in black
Urban Decay Blue Liner in Flipside
MAC Too dolly eyeshadow (to set the blue liner)***LE, you can use any blue eyeshadow

Cheecks:
MAC Blush in PeachyKeen
NARS Deep Throat Blush (its too sheer for me so I layer)

Lips:
A dot of Anime OCC lip tar for a stain of color

Face:
Makeup Forvever Velvet Matte Foundation
MAC Studio Concealer

XOXO,
Awilda

Makeup Inspiration: Katy Perry

Hi Beauties,

I really enjoy looking at celebrity photos online for makeup inspiration. I thought it would be a great idea to occasionally post some of the celebrity photo that I find and hopefully help you get some great ideas.

Today's Inspiration Post is on Katy Perry. Enjoy!

**these photos are all high resolution, click on them to view larger***




XOXO,
Awilda

Organize Your Makeup Like the Kardashians

Hi Beauties!

For those of you who tune in to watch the Keeping Up With the Kardashians, you've probably seen a few shots of the girls' makeup organizers.



Low and behold is the super fabulous (uber expensive) organizers they use to display their makeup stash.
Personally, I don't really want to pay price tag for this, because really I would need about 3 or 4! You can buy it at Clear Cube for $290.00.

I found some cheaper options online.

Muji Acrylic 5 drawer organizer $23.95 (currently out of stock :-( )

Muji Acrylic Case 2 Drawer Organizer $22.75 (currently out of stock :-( )
Container Store 3 Drawer Box $11.99
I think these would make great Christmas gifts for those girly girls you may know. :-) 

Happy Shopping!


XOXO,
Awilda

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How tall is Davina McCall?

Height: 5 feet 7 inches

Davina McCall is a British television presenter and actress, known for appearing on the television program Big Brother.

John McCain Height

How tall is John McCain?

Height: 5 feet 8 inches

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Danny McBride Height

How tall is Danny McBride?

Height: 5 feet 11 inches

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Chi McBride Height

How tall is Chi McBride?

Height: 6 feet 4.5 inches

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James McAvoy Height

How tall is James McAvoy?

Height: 5 feet 7 inches

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Nell McAndrew Height

How tall is Nell McAndrew?

Height: 5 feet 8 inches

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Rachel McAdams Height

How tall is Rachel McAdams?

Height: 5 feet 5 inches

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Travis Mccoy Height

How tall is Travis Mccoy?

Height: 6 feet 5 inches

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Debi Mazar Height

How tall is Debi Mazar?

Height: 5 feet 5 inches

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Peter Mayhew Height

How tall is Peter Mayhew?

Height: 7 feet 3 inches

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Giving Thanks!

Firstly, I'd like to wish all of you reading this a very happy and safe thanksgiving.

Right around this time of year, while mostly all of us are busy with preparations for thanksgiving and/or traveling to be in the company of your loved ones, I like to reflect on life over the last year.

I've been thinking about all of the things that I'd like to give thanks for. And I'd like to share some other these things with all of you.

I'm thankful for...
My family. They are the most important people in my life.

I'm thankful for...
My health and that of those who I care most about. Unfortunately, about 2 months ago, someone in my boyfriends family lost her fight with Ovarian Cancer. She was only 32.

I'm thankful for...
The challenges that life set forth for me this year. Without those challenges, I couldn't push myself to get to 'next'.


I'm thankful for...
The new professional opportunities that came my way this year.


I'm thankful for...
All of those meaningful moments I've shared with the people I love.  The laughs, the stories and even the tears.


I'm thankful for...
The people that follow my blog and my youtube channel. Beleive it or not, I read every single message sent to me. And I can't express how much I appreciate the time and kind words I receive from you. Thank you!

I'm thankful for...
Life! it's just a beautiful gift and we take it for granted.


Cheers to you all!



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How tall is John Mayer?

Height: 6 feet 3 inches

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How tall is Rik Mayall?

Height: 5 feet 11 inches

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Jodhi May Height

How tall is Jodhi May?

Height: 5 feet 8 inches

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Brian May Height

How tall is Brian May?

Height: 6 feet 2 inches

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Lisa Maxwell Height

How tall is Lisa Maxwell?

Height: 5 feet 2 inches

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Have a cruelty-free Thanksgiving!

Have a great Thanksgiving everyone... and as I do every year, I hereby counsel you all to LEAVE THE INNOCENT TURKEY ALONE! He or she did not do anything to you!

(I guess the new cool thing is actually going out and killing your own turkey, like you are on Survivor or something?)

See you all in a couple of days... eat lots of mashed potatoes! :)

John Matuszak Height

How tall is John Matuszak?

Height: 6 feet 7 inches

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Victor Mature Height

How tall was Victor Mature?

Height: 6 feet 2 inches

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Dave Matthews Height

How tall is Dave Matthews?

Height: 6 feet 2 inches

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What kind of magazine are you?




You Are a News Magazine



You are well informed and bright. You feel like you have to know what's going on in the world.

You are savvy and serious. You don't like a lot of fluff or filler in your life.



You are truly curious about people, ideas, and politics. You are very cosmopolitan.

You can usually explain the news to your friends and family members. You have a broad understanding of what's happening.


Walter Matthau Height

How tall was Walter Matthau?

Height: 6 feet 2.5 inches

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Reflections on Jack Ruby

Depending upon who you read, Jack Ruby was a petty strip-club gangster or an important mobster-friend of Sam Giancana.







NOTE: Last year at this time, I posted this and I've gotten a fair number of hits on it ever since. I am running it again, since it accurately captures my nostalgic feelings/memories at the end of every November. Comments welcome on both posts.


~*~


It was November 24, 1963.

I remember that I was sitting on a footstool, my nose approximately 8 inches from my family's black-and-white TV set. If I got too close, I couldn't see anything, but I was intent on getting just as close as I could. I wanted to see it all.

It was Sunday morning, and I remember well the hubbub of the adults in the kitchen. I was the only one in the small dining room that served as our TV room. I heard the TV-news announcer say that Lee Oswald was going to be transferred in an armored vehicle. I didn't know what an armored vehicle was, but it sounded awesome. And yet... that little guy? As a six-year-old, I was surprised that such a skinny little guy could be the villain of the hour. I had expected the president's assassin to look something like Brutus, the dastardly evil man of the Popeye cartoons... or at least, he should bear some resemblance to Lex Luthor. This skinny, slight, soft-spoken fellow who calmly denied being near Dealey Plaza? Well, he was just spooky, that's all. They kept calling him a Marxist and a communist, words I didn't yet understand but knew meant that he was a bad person. (I would say the word "communist" in 1963 had the similar gravitas of the word "terrorist" in 2009.) I was enthralled by the constant TV-coverage, the switching back and forth from Dallas to Washington... to our new president, Lyndon Johnson and then back to the basement of Dallas city jail. It was as dazzling as space travel.

Middle-American culture had changed utterly and completely in only two days.

For one thing, the TV had not always been on before. You turned on the TV to watch something, and when it was over, you turned it off. Sometimes you left it on, but usually not. Among the working classes, it was not unusual for some families not to own a TV at all. There were often anti-TV holdouts in these families; cantankerous, old-school types who thought TV was all rubbish and probably unchristian. But after this weekend? This archaic viewpoint was consigned to the dustbin of history. Back in my first-grade class, I would hear about parents who had rushed out to buy a TV at long last. They simply could not bear to be left out.

The TV had been turned on, and stayed on. It was on when I got home from school, dismissed early due to the tragedy, and it was on throughout the funeral. And it stayed on forever after.

And the TV was on as they transferred Lee Oswald to the armored vehicle, or attempted to. There was much talk about security because tensions were running extremely high; there was palpable fury throughout the city of Dallas. When police had forcibly taken Oswald from the theater where they had discovered him, hostile mobs surrounded the police car, and it was said he might have been torn to pieces if the crowd had been able to get their hands on him.

Listening to all this, I was riveted. I remember peering intently as they brought him out, my nose almost right on the screen: There he is!

And then, the inevitable disappointment: such a nonthreatening little dude he was.

I peered and peered and then... bang. Oswald was down.

What?

It was so quick. If not for the firecracker-noise of the gun, I would never have known.

"They shot him!" I shouted, "They shot Oswald! They shot him!"

The adults stampeded as one entity, from the kitchen to the small dining room where I was. My mother, grandparents, some other relatives I have since forgotten... possibly my cousin Charlene.

"I SAW it!" I was shouting, "I SAW IT!"

SSSSSSSssssssshhhhhhhh! Everyone was shushing me. Had I really seen that? The adults' eyes were collectively popping. I felt pretty important for being the one to see it.

"He must be really mad about the president, huh?" I asked.

Nobody answered. They kept shushing me, as obviously-shaken news-announcers talked about what they had just witnessed.

And then, the adults were all looking at each other, that way adults did when they were thinking things that they would not share with children.

Finally, my grandfather said, in what I have come to call his Christian Science Wisdom voice: "Well, that really stinks."

My mother's eyes were wide, wide, wide.

My grandfather shook his head and said "Stinks!" again, rather emphatically. My mother nodded gravely back at him.

I didn't know what he meant then.

The TV-announcers were saying his name: Jack Ruby. The man's name was Jack Ruby.

~*~

Like millions of Americans that day, I saw a murder on live television. Because the murder was widely perceived as an act of justice, nobody worried about the ill effects on all of us children who saw it. And later, many years and decades later, when we began to doubt that what we saw was justice and instead wondered if it had been the silencing of a co-conspirator... nobody worried about the erosion of our morality and the consequential development of our cynicism.

But I trace it all back to that day, the day in the basement of the Dallas city jail.

They ask us, do you remember where you were when John F. Kennedy was assassinated? But I always ask, instead: What did you think when his accused murderer was pronounced dead? Because the silencing began then, the questions asked that will forever remain unanswered. (As Norman Mailer once explained the existence of the angry kids of the 60s: They hated the authority because the authority had lied.)

My grandfather was right. It certainly did stink. And the stench covered everything.

The lies of the powerful were uncovered and exposed before us, that morning in the basement of the Dallas city jail.

Some of us never forgot.